Birth announcements are tough for bereaved parents, period. Since Noah died I have seen so many of these from people around me, family, friends, colleagues and even now one year later, pregnant with his baby sister, I find myself feeling just as crappy as I did when I saw my first one. So I wonder… Continue reading Does it ever get easier?
“Nothing to celebrate”
In the lead up to Noah's first birthday someone said "you can't really celebrate his birthday there is nothing to celebrate". Just like that my heart was shattered all over again. Now this person may not have understood the full extent of the damage a throw away comment like this would cause but in a… Continue reading “Nothing to celebrate”
Nowhere to hide
This world isn't designed for bereaved parents, we live in a society so obsessed with babies that it is impossible to find refuge from our loss anywhere. Triggers of our grief can be found everywhere; seeing a pregnant lady in the street or a newborn at the nursery, pregnancy or birth announcements on social media… Continue reading Nowhere to hide
One final goodbye
A lot happens when a baby dies that unless you have been touched by baby loss in some way you may never know. You see the death of a baby isn't treated the same as that of an adult, families are robbed of a lifetime of memories and in some cases never got a chance… Continue reading One final goodbye
The M word
I don't often talk about the miscarriage I had before I fell pregnant with Noah, in fact before Noah died I didn't talk about it at all, I couldn't. I still find it harder to talk about, harder than talking about Noah, for some reason there seems to be more stigma attached to miscarriage, than… Continue reading The M word
School Admissions Day
So today we received Oliver's school place for September, thankfully we were give our first choice which immediately filled me with joy. My first born is finally going to school, he is reaching that milestone and we were lucky to have the one we picked first. After dropping him off at nursery, I sat down… Continue reading School Admissions Day
The wrong things
In amongst the attempts of comfort and support you will find that people can say and do the wrong things. They do not mean to hurt you and no doubt believe that what they are saying or doing will comfort you. It's simply just their blissful ignorance to baby loss prevents them from knowing how… Continue reading The wrong things
Dad is hurting too
A lot of the time when a baby dies the main focus is on the Mothers, for some reason people feel as though Mothers suffer more pain than the Fathers of the baby. They often think the Mother carried the baby so she must be suffering so much more. This is not true. Although Noah's… Continue reading Dad is hurting too
Safe zones
Pregnancy safe zones has been on my mind recently after having a conversation with a friend about a current pregnancy. It seems in society we are supposed to keep our pregnancies a total secret just in case "something happens", in the early stages. Possibly because as a society we are just not prepared to deal… Continue reading Safe zones
“Happily ever after”
In life we are disillusioned to think there is ALWAYS a happy ending, the idea that everything will turn out okay in the end. We believe that once you have been through something so terrible it couldn't possible happen again, could it? That would be unfair. Throughout the entire baby loss community everyone is searching… Continue reading “Happily ever after”
Searching for the light 